the whir of the fan, beep of my alarm;
ignoring them both;
i hear a tiptoe coming towards me;
i keep my eyes closed, to see what happens next;
will it be a tickle?
will it be a pinch?
will i be jumped upon?
no.
i feel a soft bunny rabbit being tucked into my covers;
i feel a small hand patting its ears onto my face;
and i hear a tiptoe leaving my room.
mornings at my house. sweet. gentle. love.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Monday, July 26, 2010
Weekend travels!
My passport is full. I did so much traveling this weekend...and all of it from the tiny galley-style kitchen of mine. Cooking sets me free and this weekend I was on fire!
First I flew down to Key West, and made a lovely Key Lime Pie;
next I went to a Vegetarian Retreat far in the mountains and made "Healthy Joes" - TVP, homemade BBQ sauce, black beans and collard greens on whole wheat rolls;
next I took Izaac to a Carnival on a pier somewhere and had Baked Corn dogs (whole wheat/corn meal breading);
and from there it was on to Italy where my boy and I whipped up some delicious homemade pesto;
we couldn't stay long there because we had to travel back to New England to make some Orange Cranberry muffins;
then it was on to the Middle East where I made some Beet Hummus (thanks Tracy for the recipe!);
we took a shortcut and landed in a Vegan camp in the woods, where we made and enjoyed, lettuce, peach, date, hemp and OJ smoothies;
after our departure we went back to Italy for some Pesto Pasta with Zucchini and Summer Squash.
We took a brief detour to Saco, ME to enjoy the fun of Splashtown, then hopped in the Superdubaru and made our way home. A couple jogs thrown in for good measure and we had a great weekend.
It's amazing how far we can go in that little kitchen. Imagine what we could do with a normal sized one, an island or even a counter surface larger than a dishrack!
First I flew down to Key West, and made a lovely Key Lime Pie;
next I went to a Vegetarian Retreat far in the mountains and made "Healthy Joes" - TVP, homemade BBQ sauce, black beans and collard greens on whole wheat rolls;
next I took Izaac to a Carnival on a pier somewhere and had Baked Corn dogs (whole wheat/corn meal breading);
and from there it was on to Italy where my boy and I whipped up some delicious homemade pesto;
we couldn't stay long there because we had to travel back to New England to make some Orange Cranberry muffins;
then it was on to the Middle East where I made some Beet Hummus (thanks Tracy for the recipe!);
we took a shortcut and landed in a Vegan camp in the woods, where we made and enjoyed, lettuce, peach, date, hemp and OJ smoothies;
after our departure we went back to Italy for some Pesto Pasta with Zucchini and Summer Squash.
We took a brief detour to Saco, ME to enjoy the fun of Splashtown, then hopped in the Superdubaru and made our way home. A couple jogs thrown in for good measure and we had a great weekend.
It's amazing how far we can go in that little kitchen. Imagine what we could do with a normal sized one, an island or even a counter surface larger than a dishrack!
Thursday, July 22, 2010
A Registry I Should Have Created...
I remember years ago creating my "Baby Registry"...it was exciting to roam around the store with electronic gun in hand, zapping items here and there - picturing my cute little boy wearing a bib that said "I Love Mommy"...envisioning myself enveloped in the Bobby pillow, happily nursing away - fresh diapers, fresh wipes, new clothes, fun toys.
5 and a half years later I realize what I should have registered for:
Time
Patience
Money
Masters in Child Psychology
Bachelors in Elementary Education
Certificate to teach phys. ed.
Taxi driver certification
Magic powers
18 year supply of Pinot Grigio
18 year contract with Merry Maids
Conflict resolution tactical guide
Endless Energy
Lifetime supply of wet wipes
Full College Tuition
One thing I didn't need to register for...one bright, charming, adorable, loving, smart, funny boy who has tested me physically, mentally and emotionally every day of my life since November of 2004. I got one of those.
5 and a half years later I realize what I should have registered for:
Time
Patience
Money
Masters in Child Psychology
Bachelors in Elementary Education
Certificate to teach phys. ed.
Taxi driver certification
Magic powers
18 year supply of Pinot Grigio
18 year contract with Merry Maids
Conflict resolution tactical guide
Endless Energy
Lifetime supply of wet wipes
Full College Tuition
One thing I didn't need to register for...one bright, charming, adorable, loving, smart, funny boy who has tested me physically, mentally and emotionally every day of my life since November of 2004. I got one of those.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
My life...and fridge is full!
A big part of my life is food. It's what led me to gain about 75 lbs with my pregnancy; helped me lose 35 through Weight Watchers; helped me fuel my Triathlons, Half-Marathons and day to day activities. I read about food. I think about food. I love food. I love healthy, good food. I love knowing who grows and harvests my food. That is why I'm a CSA member. Community Supported Agriculture for those of you who aren't familiar. It's a way of buying a "share" of interest in a farm's harvest. Basically I pay a larger sum of money up front for weekly boxes of locally grown, organic, happy produce. It's awesome. My son learns where food comes from. We learn what to do with kholrabi and we create friendships with the farmers and fellow shareholders. Overall, it's an old fashioned hippie fun time!
Last week I made a lovely summer lasagna:
Leftover roasted eggplant, homemade tomato sauce with fresh basil, homemade pesto, onions, zucchini and summer squash, oven ready lasagna noodles and light sprinkling of parmesan cheese. Layer all of that and bake, covered in a 375 degree oven until the noodles are cooked. (about 40 minutes) I made this in a loaf pan so I had just enough for a few work lunches. DELISH.
On to this week's harvest:
Lettuce
Arugula
Green Bunching Onion
Collard Greens
Beets with Beet Greens
Salad Radishes
Summer Squash
Cucumbers
Basil
Kohlrabi
Radicchio -- probably just Tuesday as we wait for some more maturity in the rest of the row.
Small bunch of loose flowers
What am I going to do with all of this? I'm not sure yet but a few things that come to mind are beets and beet greens with nutritional yeast sauce, kholrabi hashbrowns and eggs for a "breakfast for dinner night"; oven roasted radicchio with balsamic and olive oil, sauteed collard greens with baked potato, yogurt and fresh herbs, and my personal favorite, an homage to my Grammy Stevens, Grammy Blake and my Mom....
Cucumbers with salt and/or Salad Seasoning.
Like most family traditions we conciously and unconciously pass down, someday I will open my own vehicle's glove box and find a salt shaker..for those times when we just can't wait until we get home to eat a cucumber, fresh from the ground.
Last week I made a lovely summer lasagna:
Leftover roasted eggplant, homemade tomato sauce with fresh basil, homemade pesto, onions, zucchini and summer squash, oven ready lasagna noodles and light sprinkling of parmesan cheese. Layer all of that and bake, covered in a 375 degree oven until the noodles are cooked. (about 40 minutes) I made this in a loaf pan so I had just enough for a few work lunches. DELISH.
On to this week's harvest:
Lettuce
Arugula
Green Bunching Onion
Collard Greens
Beets with Beet Greens
Salad Radishes
Summer Squash
Cucumbers
Basil
Kohlrabi
Radicchio -- probably just Tuesday as we wait for some more maturity in the rest of the row.
Small bunch of loose flowers
What am I going to do with all of this? I'm not sure yet but a few things that come to mind are beets and beet greens with nutritional yeast sauce, kholrabi hashbrowns and eggs for a "breakfast for dinner night"; oven roasted radicchio with balsamic and olive oil, sauteed collard greens with baked potato, yogurt and fresh herbs, and my personal favorite, an homage to my Grammy Stevens, Grammy Blake and my Mom....
Cucumbers with salt and/or Salad Seasoning.
Like most family traditions we conciously and unconciously pass down, someday I will open my own vehicle's glove box and find a salt shaker..for those times when we just can't wait until we get home to eat a cucumber, fresh from the ground.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Wearing pretty dresses...
A few weeks ago I was picking up my son when one of the teachers pulled me aside to share something cute. She told me that one of the little girls told the teacher she wished I was her mother because I'm so pretty. It was cute, flattering and a little embarassing to be honest. Most days I'm running late and my hair is always wet and my makeup is rarely applied beyond blush...but to a little girl I was beautiful.
I always wondered who the little girl was. Was it the one with cornrows and the huge smile? Was it the sweet girl who always asked me where I was going? Was it the girl who could never sit still? Over the next few weeks I forgot about the mini ego-boost until yesterday.
I went into the school and smiled at one of the teachers. She stopped me and said "I wanted you to know that my daughter hopes to be in reincarnated as your daughter because you are always wearing pretty dresses". I smiled and said that was sweet but that she should know that I wear dresses mostly because I hate ironing, I'm chronically late and they are cheap, and easy.
Behind our laughter, I saw the sadness on the mother's face. Hidden behind her warm smile was the pain of thinking your child wishes that someone else could possibly be better. It bothered me. I felt guilty. I wanted to kneel down and tell the little girl that her mother was beautiful and although she didn't wear dresses, she was perfect. I wear dresses and I am not perfect. I wanted to tell the little girl that dresses don't make you a woman. That beauty doesn't equal value. I wanted to tell her that her mother needed her approval.
My son knows how to hit below the belt. He has told me I look like a "father" when my hair is pulled back and when I have an oxford shirt on. He has told me he wants a different mother. He has told me he wants to live with his father instead of me. He has told me I'm ugly and that I'm not a princess. I let these comments go because at 5, this is how they cause pain. With words and occasionally little fists or feet.
I came to school this morning to find the mother on the playground watching the children and her daughter. Guess what she was wearing?
A beautiful, flowing, brightly colored dress.
I always wondered who the little girl was. Was it the one with cornrows and the huge smile? Was it the sweet girl who always asked me where I was going? Was it the girl who could never sit still? Over the next few weeks I forgot about the mini ego-boost until yesterday.
I went into the school and smiled at one of the teachers. She stopped me and said "I wanted you to know that my daughter hopes to be in reincarnated as your daughter because you are always wearing pretty dresses". I smiled and said that was sweet but that she should know that I wear dresses mostly because I hate ironing, I'm chronically late and they are cheap, and easy.
Behind our laughter, I saw the sadness on the mother's face. Hidden behind her warm smile was the pain of thinking your child wishes that someone else could possibly be better. It bothered me. I felt guilty. I wanted to kneel down and tell the little girl that her mother was beautiful and although she didn't wear dresses, she was perfect. I wear dresses and I am not perfect. I wanted to tell the little girl that dresses don't make you a woman. That beauty doesn't equal value. I wanted to tell her that her mother needed her approval.
My son knows how to hit below the belt. He has told me I look like a "father" when my hair is pulled back and when I have an oxford shirt on. He has told me he wants a different mother. He has told me he wants to live with his father instead of me. He has told me I'm ugly and that I'm not a princess. I let these comments go because at 5, this is how they cause pain. With words and occasionally little fists or feet.
I came to school this morning to find the mother on the playground watching the children and her daughter. Guess what she was wearing?
A beautiful, flowing, brightly colored dress.
Monday, July 19, 2010
Things I have learned...
I have learned that once you begin to share your life with the "world" or at least those few who have subscribed to your blog, you notice and think about so many more things you want to share, and you realize how little time you have to share it. This can get overwhelming - you feel like you owe it to everyone to make the most of your post...but I don't have internet when I'm not at work and when I'm at work I'm well...working...so I'll do my best to bring you up to speed.
I have learned that my favorite part of the day is when I round the corner into the pre-school playground and look for my little "chick", chirping amongst the others. I have learned that in that brief moment, when my eyes meet with my son, I am seen as a hero, a goddess, a friend. We are genuinely happy to see eachother. No matter what has happened during the day (good, bad, ugly) it goes out the window and we are back to square one. Just the two of us. I will be sad when he doesn't run over to me with a big grin and bury his face into my shoulder with a great hug. I hope that I never forget to be just as excited to see him each day, as I was the first day I met him. It matters. I have learned that you have to show up - no matter what, just show up for your child. Let him or her know that you left earlier, but you came back, and that you always will.
I have learned my new favorite post-workout snack is "Recovery Pudding" from Brendan Brazier's book Thrive. Mash a banana, some Vega optimizer (or flax and hemp protein powder if you don't get Vega), blueberries, cocoa powder and a Tb. of peanut butter...it's ugly but delicious.
I have learned that you can almost make delicious smoothies with lettuce! My CSA has given me 5 heads of lettuce in two weeks. What to do with it all? Blend 6 romaine leaves or as much or as little as you want, with 2 c water, melon or apple, and more of the powder mentioned above - healthy and delish.
I have learned that taking a Friday off and going to a Yoga class at Portland Yoga with Melora as the instructor is a WONDERFUL way to start a weekend. This was a Vinyasa flow class that I had a coupon for. It was lovely. Melora glowed and I had trouble imagining her being anything but in love with life and the people in it. My post yoga vanilla soy late from Coffee By Design (my favorite) was the icing on the cake. I walked down to the pre-school and hid behind the trees to watch my boy in action on the playground. He was laughing and drawing on the building with chalk. Oh to be 5 1/2 again. Life is easy.
I have learned that it takes a small fortune to take your child to the Clam Festival but it was worth every penny. So what if my checking account balance resembles the proceeds after a small lemonade stand...I got to see my son giggle with glee as he got to ride rides "alone" since he hit the 42 inch mark. I got to giggle with glee myself as we each took a seat in a bumper car. It is just as much fun at 29 as it was at 5 1/2.
I have also learned that I am forever indebted to my parents...for a lot of things but for taking me and my brother to such fun activities as carnivals and spending their hard earned money on the same...it's cheap plastic crap, fattening food, and scary rides put together with paper clips and run by strangers... but we had so much fun.
I have learned that above all, it's just money. Take my wallet, take my car, take my shoes, take my "things"...I'll still be very rich.
I have learned that my favorite part of the day is when I round the corner into the pre-school playground and look for my little "chick", chirping amongst the others. I have learned that in that brief moment, when my eyes meet with my son, I am seen as a hero, a goddess, a friend. We are genuinely happy to see eachother. No matter what has happened during the day (good, bad, ugly) it goes out the window and we are back to square one. Just the two of us. I will be sad when he doesn't run over to me with a big grin and bury his face into my shoulder with a great hug. I hope that I never forget to be just as excited to see him each day, as I was the first day I met him. It matters. I have learned that you have to show up - no matter what, just show up for your child. Let him or her know that you left earlier, but you came back, and that you always will.
I have learned my new favorite post-workout snack is "Recovery Pudding" from Brendan Brazier's book Thrive. Mash a banana, some Vega optimizer (or flax and hemp protein powder if you don't get Vega), blueberries, cocoa powder and a Tb. of peanut butter...it's ugly but delicious.
I have learned that you can almost make delicious smoothies with lettuce! My CSA has given me 5 heads of lettuce in two weeks. What to do with it all? Blend 6 romaine leaves or as much or as little as you want, with 2 c water, melon or apple, and more of the powder mentioned above - healthy and delish.
I have learned that taking a Friday off and going to a Yoga class at Portland Yoga with Melora as the instructor is a WONDERFUL way to start a weekend. This was a Vinyasa flow class that I had a coupon for. It was lovely. Melora glowed and I had trouble imagining her being anything but in love with life and the people in it. My post yoga vanilla soy late from Coffee By Design (my favorite) was the icing on the cake. I walked down to the pre-school and hid behind the trees to watch my boy in action on the playground. He was laughing and drawing on the building with chalk. Oh to be 5 1/2 again. Life is easy.
I have learned that it takes a small fortune to take your child to the Clam Festival but it was worth every penny. So what if my checking account balance resembles the proceeds after a small lemonade stand...I got to see my son giggle with glee as he got to ride rides "alone" since he hit the 42 inch mark. I got to giggle with glee myself as we each took a seat in a bumper car. It is just as much fun at 29 as it was at 5 1/2.
I have also learned that I am forever indebted to my parents...for a lot of things but for taking me and my brother to such fun activities as carnivals and spending their hard earned money on the same...it's cheap plastic crap, fattening food, and scary rides put together with paper clips and run by strangers... but we had so much fun.
I have learned that above all, it's just money. Take my wallet, take my car, take my shoes, take my "things"...I'll still be very rich.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Here we go...
The first thing I should have done before starting a blog was make sure I have a reliable internet connection at home. In any event, I will do my best to craft this blog to be something other than spelling errors and neuroses. Work has been very busy lately so I was looking forward to my Weekly Back Cove 5K on Wednesday nights...with a jogger...with a 40 lb. kid in it...plus his small collection of Matchbox and Hotwheels that he HAD to bring with him.
I love running. I love what it has done to my body and mind. I used to carry the 40 lbs. on my body in the form of...well...fat, but now I get to push it. It has a cute face and asks tons of questions during my runs. It's very difficult to get into a running groove when you are asked "is that a lobster trap? what's that smell? why is everyone passing us? when is this over?" He is, however, very good at handing me the water bottle when I need it. I wanted to quit during the race. A rarity for me but I thought of his face when I would attempt to explain why I stopped running. I gain strength from the Son. I want to show him to push on despite discomfort.
Someday I'll be free to run alone but for now I must enjoy my runs with a partner. We finished respectably at 32:40...a good 2 minutes faster than my first 5K that I ran solo 4 years ago. I've come a long way.
After our run we watched the "big boys" play soccer. I realized how much I love the diversity of Portland. So many different people from so many different places. Who ever thought Maine would be such a melting pot? It's a far cry from my hometown "sameness".
On to dinner - a lot of this blog will be about cooking because it is what I love. We belong to a CSA program and it is great. We get our shares on Fridays so right now we are using up the previous shares to make fridge space for our new veggies...last night I had a Homemade Eggplant Parm Sub (homemade sauce, roasted eggplant, cheese) and boiled beets with creamy nutritional yeast sauce. If you've never tried nutritional yeast, go for it! Mixed with flour, butter, mustard and salt, it makes an awesome "cheese sauce"...even 5 year olds deal with it!
After that I did some Yoga in my living room once my babe was in bed. It was relaxing and for someone who rarely stretches post exercise...just a bad habit I guess, it made me feel great.
Then (because if you know me you know I'm too cheap to buy TV and enjoy the "unplugged" feeling - mostly because I used to spend hours in front of it and place my child in front of it to get some alone time - bad habits!) I read my book "The Lost Girls". I have to return it to the library soon. It's a big one with about 550 pages, but I have about 100 left before some other reader can go on the adventure. I know what I'll be doing tonight!
I love running. I love what it has done to my body and mind. I used to carry the 40 lbs. on my body in the form of...well...fat, but now I get to push it. It has a cute face and asks tons of questions during my runs. It's very difficult to get into a running groove when you are asked "is that a lobster trap? what's that smell? why is everyone passing us? when is this over?" He is, however, very good at handing me the water bottle when I need it. I wanted to quit during the race. A rarity for me but I thought of his face when I would attempt to explain why I stopped running. I gain strength from the Son. I want to show him to push on despite discomfort.
Someday I'll be free to run alone but for now I must enjoy my runs with a partner. We finished respectably at 32:40...a good 2 minutes faster than my first 5K that I ran solo 4 years ago. I've come a long way.
After our run we watched the "big boys" play soccer. I realized how much I love the diversity of Portland. So many different people from so many different places. Who ever thought Maine would be such a melting pot? It's a far cry from my hometown "sameness".
On to dinner - a lot of this blog will be about cooking because it is what I love. We belong to a CSA program and it is great. We get our shares on Fridays so right now we are using up the previous shares to make fridge space for our new veggies...last night I had a Homemade Eggplant Parm Sub (homemade sauce, roasted eggplant, cheese) and boiled beets with creamy nutritional yeast sauce. If you've never tried nutritional yeast, go for it! Mixed with flour, butter, mustard and salt, it makes an awesome "cheese sauce"...even 5 year olds deal with it!
After that I did some Yoga in my living room once my babe was in bed. It was relaxing and for someone who rarely stretches post exercise...just a bad habit I guess, it made me feel great.
Then (because if you know me you know I'm too cheap to buy TV and enjoy the "unplugged" feeling - mostly because I used to spend hours in front of it and place my child in front of it to get some alone time - bad habits!) I read my book "The Lost Girls". I have to return it to the library soon. It's a big one with about 550 pages, but I have about 100 left before some other reader can go on the adventure. I know what I'll be doing tonight!
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Add me to the list...
Add me to the list of those who feel like they need an outlet; need an audience; need a friend. Come with me and hear about my life - learn about yours. Laugh with me, cry with me, grow with me.
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